SUNDAY 5TH JANUARY 2014
The Ferryman thought he was back on the Larne Stranraer boat
as the wind and rain rocked us about on our way to Glaslough during the weekly Square Wheels cycle. He was nearly seasick as we entered the village. Suddenly
there was an unplanned stop as the Duff took out his Kodak Instamatic to take a
snap of the plaque dedicated to "Honest John McKenna" the first manager of
Liverpool who was from the village. “I didn’t know that” said The Duff,
“everyday’s a school day when you’re a Square Wheels member.” Charlene McKenna is from Glaslough too, you know yer woman that was in Raw, she’s some
actress” said the Ferryman. Glaslough’s some place for all the size of it.”
The tea break was welcome as we all made a puddle the
size of a swimming pool in the cafe of the paper shop. There were cappuccinos,
skinny lattés and green teas with milk and sugar as we chatted about the
Younger Schleck’s Endura overshoes which he has been holding together with his
wife’s “gogo” for a few weeks now. “They’re great overshoes” he said “but the
zipper went on the back of one of them so her gogo has been a godsend. I
couldn't find an elastic band anywhere in our house.” There were conversations
about the Roller Beast’s new overshoes which lit up the shop like a Christmas
tree. There was chat too about the Colnago Man’s waterproof coat which was
wetter on the inside than the outside. The Younger Schleck was financially
embarrassed because his wife had refused to give him any pocket money until she
had recovered the price of a gogo so we had a whip round until enough was
raised to buy him a coffee and KitKat.
The Rushmere Man and The Chairman had led us all out of
the darker than usual Moy Square on their Treks. The peloton Team Trek with aMadone here and a Domane there, here a Trek there a Trek everywhere a
Trek, Trek. The Ferryman fought back the tears as he announced that this was
his last cycle with the friendly Square Wheels club for a few weeks as he is
going back to Staffordshire for a while. “I’ll miss you guys but sure I’ll be
back!” He was still sobbing when The Oil Man started talking to him and then
The Ferryman was glad he was leaving for a while. “That man could talk the
wheel off a bike” he said.
The Oil Man was going well showing no effects of his
sleepless nights. He led the group through sleepy Armagh and on towards
Killyleagh and then to Glasslough. On the way back from Glasslough he was
cycling into all the puddles hoping to soak those riding behind him. “You don’t
need mudguards when you’re at the front so I think I’ll stay here.” The Rushmere Man was glad to get back into
the Peloton after weeks of working all hours in the lead up to Christmas even
if the mud and rain were all over his face. “There’s some taste of salt off the
road today” he said. The Chairman was handing out yellow cards like a new
referee to those without mudguards and then started showing off the snood his
wife bought him which was keeping his neck dry and warm. The Duff was humming
Christmas songs to himself and then announced that he is going to have to
change the CD in his new car. “I got the car free with the CD” he said, “I know
a bargain when I see one.” Meanwhile the Colnago Man described a recent festive
visit to A&E which meant that he missed his annual Chinese meal which he
has since made up for.
The road from Glasslough to the Dyan was a wetter one as
the rain started coming down properly. Climbing up Rehaghey was considered for
about one second as we veered right for Benburb where we regrouped and complained
about the rain again and dreamt of cycling in Majorca and Tenerife with the
warm sun on our backs. Before long we were through Blackwatertown and cruising
to the Moy where the Oil Man caught us all napping and reached the speed limit
signs when no one else was looking. “The wife will give me an extra bowl of
soup when she hears I was first across the finish line” he said.
It had been a
gentle spin in the rain and wind of around 40 miles at a pace to suit all
except those who had sneaked off to do a bit of mountain biking in the trees!
